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<3 [09 Nov 2006|03:33pm]




okay so. neither of these have titles. and i havent written anything in a very long time so they arent exactly as good as they could be... but yea. here ya go.
When I look into your eyes
The world just melts away
I wonder if you feel the same
When you look into mine...

The world just melts away
Whenever you're by my side.
When you look into [my eyes]
I secretely hope you can see me love for you.

Whenever you're by my side
All of my cares just slip away.
I secretely hope you can see my love for you
When you kiss me with all your beauty.

Whenever you're by my side;
When you kiss me with all of your beauty;
When I look into your eyes,
I wonder if you feel the same...

okay... #2.) theres a secret to this one... see if u can get it =p 
Every time I look into your eyes
Reminds me of how
Incredibly calm the world
Can be.
Once more, you kiss me
Like you do,
So tender and loving, and
Every inch of me melts into perfect

I wonder if you see me
Like i see you, like I
Only want you to. It's a
Vicious cycle, this life of mine, but
Every part of me wishes it to end with
You by my side.
Only time will tell if you will give yourself
Unto me, as i will do for you. 


♥ your great

update [23 Sep 2006|01:52pm]

yea im bored
so i just thought id update
after reading my last entry lol
schools going really good
i reeeaaally like where im living =)
ive never lived in a house where people actually ask me how my day was
and mean it
who dont worry about how much money im costing them
ummm what else
well i miss my friends lol
like. a lot. so that sucks
but i hardly think about justin at all anymore
and when i do think about him
i dont feel the need to break down into tears and wonder what i did wrong
cuz i didnt do anything wrong
so whatever.
alright well i think im done. hah
i was bored so i did this
and now im bored with it.
oh i get to pretend to be jewish tonight lol
im celebrating the jew holiday
okay time to watch a movie with the padre
peace out homies

♥ your great

*le sigh* [12 Aug 2006|10:46pm]
[ mood | im not sure... ]

i havent written a poem in about a year
not a quality one anyway.
so dont make fun...

I stare at  your picture for hours
Why can't I be
The angel you imagined
In the perfect image of "us"?
wanted to be
All  that you need
But I came to see
That the perfect story
Couldn't be.
We were not angels;
We were not perfect.
We never had a
Fairy Tale Ending
Coming our way...


♥ your great

[05 Aug 2006|09:51pm]

im so confused
i dont know who to believe
and i dont know what to think
and i have no one to talk to 
and im forced to hang out with my sister
i dont want it to be over
i dont want the friendship to be over either

...i dont know what to do...

♥ your great

[03 Aug 2006|04:09pm]

this is good

...i think...

♥ your great

[29 Jul 2006|10:55pm]

and the hits just
keep on coming

♥ your great

[29 Jul 2006|07:22pm]

so i ran away to my dads on thursday
and its now..saturday?
im going back home monday
and i have some stuff lined up to do
try to keep myself busy. 
i still feel empty
i havent been able to eat much of anything in almost a week.
and anything i do eat
it doesnt work out too well.
when i talk to justin, my face gets red hot
like the temperature in the room has raised like ten degrees in an instant. 
although what's killing me now
is that he IMed me once i got online
and we were talking for a while 
and then all of a sudden..
im invisible
and i cant help but wonder if its because that fucking girl signed on
i dont know what to do.
...im still so miserable...

♥ your great

[26 Jul 2006|11:43am]
[ mood | shattered ]

i feel like shit
 i thought for sure that my happiness would last this time
i thought we could work when i went away
i never dreamed hed be the one to end it
im a terrible person for some of the things i put him through.
if i could go back and change it
i would change everything i did wrong.
i just want to hold him
ill never get to kiss him again
he was my first...
and i knew i loved him 
i know i did.
i still do.
i want the pain to go away....

♥ your great

unreal [24 Jul 2006|01:56am]

July 23, 2006

Two teenagers were killed and two were injured when they were struck by lightning Saturday evening at Memorial Field in Montvale, police said.

The teens had been playing soccer when they were caught in a sudden downpour around 6 p.m. and were struck as they hurried from the field, said police Capt. Bob Gebhardt.

Killed were Lee Weisbrod, 19, of River Vale and Steven Fagan, 18, of Woodcliff Lake, Gebhardt said. Both suffered severe burns and trauma, he said.

Police began CPR and used a defibrillator at the scene before Weisbrod and Fagan were transported to Pascack Valley Hospital in Westwood, the captain said.

"This is really an absolute tragedy for these families," Gebhardt said. "You say goodbye to your son when he's going out to play soccer, and that's it."

Two other teens from Montvale were injured and taken to The Valley Hospital in Ridgewood, where they were reported in stable condition late Saturday. Injured were Jordan Zubalsky, 19, and a 16-year old boy whose name was not released because he is a juvenile.

According to Gebhardt:

The group had arrived during an earlier cloudburst and waited in their car for it to pass before heading out to a softball diamond that they had converted into a makeshift soccer field.

Zubalsky and the other boy began running from the field, toward Memorial School after seeing lightning nearby. Weisbrod and Fagan were walking behind them, police said. After a clap of thunder, Zubalsky turned to see lightning strike at the boys' feet and knock them to the ground.

Zubalsky dialed 911 from his cellphone. Police from Montvale and Park Ridge responded. Police were notified of the boys' deaths at Pascack Valley Hospital at 7 p.m.

Gebhardt didn't know how well the group knew each other.

"We all heed the warnings," the captain said. "Severe means severe.

"When there's lightning, don't go out."

The area was buffeted by sporadic, sometimes violent, thunderstorms and high winds throughout the late afternoon in what had been a muggy tropical pattern for most of the past week.

I knew steve. I wasnt close with him or anything but we would speak briefly at times. we kept eachother mildly entertained in math class this past year. 
and this had a really big impact on me. 
when i first hear it, i thought the person telling me was lying. 
a sick and twisted lie, but i didnt think it could be real.
i was shocked and upset
and it really got me thinking. 
im one of those stupid deep thinkers. 
it made me think about my life and how much i truely value it.
and how much i value the people around me.


♥ your great

[16 Jul 2006|06:57pm]


♥ your great

[03 Jul 2006|11:48pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]

boy and i are back together
who didn't see that coming?
♥ your great

problem [01 Jul 2006|10:13pm]
[ mood | okay ]

im a terrifble person
and he should hate me
but he doesnt
and im slowing going insane over this
the only thing i can think to do it leave...
...but i cant do that yet =/

♥ your great

[28 Jun 2006|12:39pm]
[ mood | enraged ]

all i have to say is
im fucking

♥ your great

[22 Jun 2006|01:55pm]
[ mood | blah ]

i broke up with boy today
and i kinda feel like an asshole
because i dont want him to think its anything to do with this past weekend
but i didnt tell him the truth
because i knew it would hurt him
i just cant take it. 
i really really hope things arent too weird now
but he prolly wont come out of his room for a while...

♥ your great

bleh [19 Jun 2006|07:02pm]
[ mood | blah ]

i wanted him to leave
but now i wish he would stay...

♥ your great

[18 Jun 2006|11:18am]
[ mood | tired ]


haven't updated in a whiiiiile
so i thought id just do a quick update.
things have been going pretty well.
but im rediculously stressed about finals
thank god i only have two.
but if i dont pass my history final
but other than that.
yesterday kicked ass.
i chilled at tiffany and justins.
ricks home for the weekend.
but whatever.
but anyway
justin and i brought his lil sis nicole to montvale day
it was pretty boring. seeing random people. whatever
then we watched fireworks with bogart and some people
and then got food. 
thennn we went back to the casa and ate and watched tv.
the end of the night was
but. ill keep that to myself.
today im having breakfast with maggie
because i havent chilled with her in a looooong time
then im going to tiffs house.
hopefully it will be a good day
gonna be like 95. word.
well. thats all. if anyone cares.
ppeeaaccee outt
♥ your great

[23 May 2006|12:25pm]
[ mood | flirty ]

so there's this boy
and hes ridiculously cute
and i like to kiss him
he's a bit younger than me
not alot
2 years....
does that matter?
to me...it doesnt really.
i like him anyway


i got a tattoo on saturday
♥ your great

[25 Apr 2006|12:31pm]
[ mood | content ]

i had the best weekend

♥ your great

[01 Apr 2006|01:51am]
soo tonight
i streaked my hair pink.
and i wasnt sure if i liked it. 
but  i was like. im just gonna go with it and see the reaction i get
so i got home and my mom
she said that i have to get up early tomorrow
go buy hairdye
and redo it dark
it has to be dyed before she wakes up tomorrow
this means
i have to get up around 8-fucking-30
go buy hairdye
dye my hair
go to breakfast with soog
and then go with my dad
and its. 2 am now
thats fucked up
3 think♥ your great

[29 Mar 2006|03:22pm]
[ mood | bored ]

nick:allie-rose, beaner, OB
where do you live?:park ridge new jerseyyy
height:5'7" ish
weight:umm about 125
hair color:brown
eye color:hazel
study or work?:study
hobbies?:reading writing music
smoke:cigarettes yes
tattoos:one, a shitty star
zodiac sign:gemini
favorites one or more
food:italian hero
restaurant:TGIFridays i guess lol
store:forever 21//HnM
brand:converse <3
movie:way too many
actor / actress:way too many / rachel mcadams
tv show:gilmore girls
music group:at the moment-- hit the lights
song:save your breath
website:www.myspace.com =p
book:anything by Chuck Palahniuk.
newspaper:the record
place to have a vacation:cali<3
place to have a date:i dont know
car:chevy ssr
clothes (formal, casual etc..):casual...jeans t-shirt
Have you ever
been on a train:yes
been on a plane:yes
been on another country:sadly noo
been lost:yes
been in love:i dooont know
been drunk:haha...
been high:. . . .
been in jail:not locked up
broken the law:many times...
been on a fight:in? not a fist fight
cried in public:unfortunately
fallen in public:hah yes
pee in public:if you mean outside, yes
throw up in public:if the side of a busy road counts...lol
get sick of diarrea in the worst moment:mmmmmhm
Personal questions
are you depressive?:not anymore thanks to meds ;-)
paranoic?:not at all
obsesive compulsive?:a very little
another personality illness?:bipolar 2
worst fear:death
do you injury yourself? (cutting, etc..):not anymore
do you have suicidal toughts?:absolutely NOT
have you ever tried to commit suicide?:nooooooo
have you ever think to kill somebody?:of course lol
at what age would you like to die?:i dont know. id live forever if i could
the way you want to die:peacfully-- in my sleep
do you hate somebody to death?:kinda
what do you hate the most in life:drama
do you love somebody in a obsesive way?:nope
do you want to get married?:eventually
want to have children?:eventually
want to live on another country?:IRELAND
how do you imagine yourself in 5 years?:lost
are you materialist?:not going to lie...a little bit
do you believe in aliens?:idk
do you believe in ghosts?:yes
your religion?:agnostic
do you believe in life after death?:i want to
do you believe in love at first sight?:idk
reincarnation?:i wish
are you, gay, bi, straight?:STRAIGHTTT
have you ever been in love of someone of the same sex?:nope
have you ever kissed someone of the same sex?:yes
do you have homosexual fantasies?:nope
do yuo have some paraphilia? (zoophilia, necrophilia) etc:nooo
do you like sadomasoquism?:um. i like biting. a lot.
do you like to bite?:hahaha
do you use sexual toys? (dildos, vibrators etc..):nope
sex on the first date?:nope
turns you on:a really nice stomach
turns you off:a really hairy stomach
an unsual place to have sex:idk
you best sexual lover:n/a
how many one night stands?:none
favorite position:n/a
your sickness and pervert fantasy:iii dont know
some artist that turns you on:hm.. dane cook? there are a lot of singers that are way hott
do you like porno, hentai?:haha
best date you ever had:diner and going to see waiting at like 2 AM
whit who?:tyler
do you miss some ex boyfriend,girlfriend?:yes
have you ever been in love at first sight?:kinda
been rejected by someone you love?:yes
suffer for someone who doesn´t deserve it?:yes
are you in love right know?:idk
the most crazy thing you do for love:um.
the most stupid thing you do for love:idk
been in love of an artist:hah an actor
who?:norman reedus =p
your perfect, girl, boy:very skinny. tall. long hair. nice stomach. ...sound familiar?
the perfect date for you, describe it:idk
most romantic moment:walking through the park, being very cold and having him put his jacket around me and warming my hands
some ex you will nerver forget:taking the 5th
do you regret about been involved with some person?:nope
do you prefer to be alone or to have a couple?:idk
some ex, you don´t want to see never again:...dave
most humilliant moment on a date:none
worst date:none
have you ever been in love of some anime character?:hah no
do you like to flirt a lot?:yess
do you like serious relations, or you prefer to have frees?:frees
are you jealous?:very...im irish lol
you prefer somebody with a great personality or someboy that looks so good?:personality 100%
how do you consider yourself? atractive, average, not good looking:average
Take this survey | Find more surveys
You've been totally Bzoink*d
♥ your great

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